This is kinda like a guest blog. The guest being me circa 1993. Not a lot has changed, either I was pretty damn advanced for a 20 year old back in the day or I'm pretty unadvanced at 37...you be the judge. This was uncovered yesterday, tucked in the back of a 1990 Rand McNally Florida Road Atlas...one of the few things that have managed unpurged over the years. It was from before GPS and mapquest...back when you actually had to pay attention to your surroundings and not just some monotone directional nazi. Nothing has been edited including the title.
Well this has been the year of years for me. I guess that old saying about whatever you're doing at midnight on New Year's Eve is what you'll be doing all year has about as much truth to it as good smelling cow shit. Last New Year's Eve as I sat miserably in my miserable little house, watching the stupid apple fall with my beyond stupid husband, I honestly believed that I had arrived, that this is it. My God, this is how my life is going to be. The really sad part of it all is that a lot of people would have accepted it, figured they made a mistake and just lived with it. There is no way that life is supposed to be so unhappy. It can't be. There's so much more to it all. I can't help but believe that our sole purpose in life is to sustain happiness, not existence. Way too often everybody gets so caught up in the details of life, and loose touch with the meaning, kind of like not seeing the forest for the trees. Simplicity has got to be the key. Everything is so complex, but complex is made up a whole lot of simple things. Everything has to be taken for what it is, not always what it seems. Don't worry about it if you can't do anything about it.
Happiness is the whole point of our existence, not only survival. I can not understand how people can get so caught up in the bitch and moan rut that they let their entire lives pass them by without ever even knowing themselves enough to like themselves. Life is so incredibly short, how could anybody not see that? I never want to go through even one miserable day. What it that was my last? We can't be so intent on planning for tomorrow that we forget that we have today. Today is the day that I want to live, tomorrow is a gift.
I guess now I realize that I have yet to arrive, I've not even come close to my dreams. But my dreams, whatever they may be, will never hold me back from living today. My short term goal I guess is to have fun with life and to always, no matter how bad I have the Chinese Dude, be happy. I really think it's possible.
No comments:
Post a Comment